You know what I love? How miserable and uncomfortable I've been lately. How discouraged and worthless I've felt. I love it. Every second of it.
I'm not crazy, either.
This is what I picture. Satan's sitting at his little control desk, in a bad mood, like always. He's drinking his coffee, staring at a little radar screen. He zooms in on the US. He's always had considerable "productivity" there. Sexual sin is the biggest payoff. He chuckles as he thinks about all the people who strike it rich but will eventually lose it all. Suddenly, a little blip flashes on his radar. There are million all over the world, but when another one pops up it always strikes a nerve in him.
"Crap," he says. "Not another one."
He zooms in. He sees a young kid. Lanky and clumsy, yet passionate. The Enemy watches as the kid talks to someone about Jesus. He seems kinda serious. Maybe a little too serious.
"That's not good," Satan whispers to himself. "Might have to take care of that..."
That's me.
The Enemy is taking time to discover my weaknesses, like a lion getting ready to eat a gazelle, following it's pattern; exploiting its flaws. He knows every crevice of pain I hide. Every sin he can grow and water, like a morbid weed, and then expose it in hopes of destroying me. Sorry bud, but I kinda just foiled your "element of surprise".
I may never be cool. I may never be well-liked. I may never make another friend. I may never have a wife I can love and cherish. I may never have children. I may never get rich. I may never become a successful minister! I may die. I may never become all that I've dreamed of.
But I will always be a soldier of my Lord, Jesus Christ. I will always fight these spiritual battles. I will always stand for the most important thing in the universe.
But most of all, as long as I have breath in my lungs, I will be a threat to the Enemy. I will call upon the strength of the Father and I will not be destroyed.
"The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full."
